Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Remember how I was in the process of creating a 10 part series entitled, "How to Find a Mate in 2008"? I only published 2 entries and the remaining 8 are written on random pieces of note book paper scattered throughout my room. Back in March, in the midst of crafting what I thought would lead thousands to their mate in '08, I had an epiphany: I should follow my own advice.
My first step was to do some serious self-evaluation. March of this year, I realized I needed to become a better person, fear nothing, and focus on what I could control. Consequently, I was working 12 hour days at work, getting pay raises, exercising daily, focusing on my calling in Church, and working zealously to be the best I could be. I thought nothing of dating and guys-- I was burned out on dates, unproductive flirting, and mindless chatter at hormone infested parties. My new goal: To be the Sheri Dew of the 30-somethings!
About this time, I picked up an obsession for playing tennis. One Friday in May I wanted to play tennis so badly I went through my phone to see who could play. Everyone was on a stinking date! Boring. Everyone except for Scott. I hesitantly called him and we played that night.
Before I go any further, let me tell you about Scott. I have known him for over a year now. We have been in the same ward, gone to the same parties, have the same mutual friends. A year ago I asked him to some lame girl ask guy Stake activity only because he was safe and my roommate wanted to get to know him without having to ask him out. Of course, I ignored him the whole time. I am dumb like that. Here's a picture of me ignoring him that night:
Months later, he became good friends with my roommate and he would spend more and more time hanging out with us.
I never paid much attention to him then either. I was still in that phase where the flirty guys captured all my attention. That was probably because I was in denial that 30 years of age was staring me in the face.
In December Scott and I ended up talking one night and I remember thinking that he was amazing... but way too pensive, deep, quiet, and serious for me. I figured he probably didn't have a thing for women with social ADD.
Okay, back to May when Scott and I played tennis for the first time. We played for weeks and weeks after that. We became tennis partners and were the undefeated champions. After playing tennis, we ended up talking for hours and hours discussing and philosophizing. I saw a different side of him every night we would talk. I appreciated his emotional maturity, his depth of character, his view on life, his love for all people and sharing the gospel. We grew up in similar circumstances and he didn't ever go to BYU (which as I have mentioned in previous entries is always a plus). I would walk away from our conversations, empowered and eager to see him again.
About this time, I was going full speed ahead with improving my life. Work and tennis were the only things that ever consumed my time. Even though I Scott and I were becoming the best of friends, I refused to let myself fall into old patterns of running away out of fear. So I decided to just enjoy my friendship. That didn't last long though. I was secretly starting to like him-- never voiced it though (which was the smartest thing I ever did). I had no idea how he felt about me and I didn't want to know either.
Out of the blue one afternoon he sent me a text which read, "You want to go to dinner tonight? It's on me... Happy friendship appreciation day!" Blah blah blah. Free dinner, yes... but disappointed I was just becoming the best friend and wasting my time spending every spare moment with a guy who viewed me as just a friend. I went on the friendship appreciation day outing that night and I couldn't convince myself to run away even though I was just a friend.
For weeks and weeks following we would play tennis and talk for hours (every time he initiated it-- I NEVER called him). I was miserable yet content. I went on vacation for Florida for a week and missed him terribly. Then he went on vacation for a week and I missed him again. He called me when he got back and I was SO excited to talk to him. ARGH! I liked him A LOT.
Then, things got interesting. He asked me on a real date shortly after his return from vacation. We were inseparable from that point on. I found out what that whole friendship appreciation text was about-- he was just testing the waters. He's a smart guy.
Eventually, he became my best friend and my boyfriend! C-U-T-E. Did I mention he's 25?